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American Descendant of Slavery, The Album

by Terry Blade

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    An ethnographic-musical album by Terry Blade with a focus on the intersectionality of his social and cultural identity as a gay Black-American descendant of slaves. The project incorporates original music with ethnographic audio recordings (1941 - 1975) of former enslaved African-Americans (and their descendants) curated from the archives of the American Folklife Center, Citizen DJ Project - American Dialect English Recordings of the United States Library of Congress. The ethnographic recordings are captured throughout the album's 11 track interludes.
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  • Full Digital Discography

    Get all 18 Terry Blade releases available on Bandcamp and save 50%.

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Ethos: Son of a Sharecropper, For You, Neo Queer, Unmastered: The Demo Sessions, Eaten Alive, Read the Room (Special Version), Elixir, Forward (Live), and 10 more. , and , .

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1.
2.
INward 02:45
Niggas wanna take my shit Niggas wanna act real slick I’m talkin ya’ll niggas Niggas say they want the carrot, but they get the stick A nigga’s head harder than a brick (my nigga!) Niggas wanna run up real quick Niggas talkin with the toothpick Them some beautiful niggas Niggas like Versace but they homophobic Timbs for the ass they ‘bout to kick Niggas slave descendants that’s a whole notha’ angle Black aint all the same Why ya’ll get that shit entangled A.D.O.S. niggas know we got our own lingo Tracing our ancestors way back to the shango Why you think we can’t let the pain go Dealin’ what that same ole’ same ole’ White fuckshit Gotta make you wonder why our parents so strict They rush to beat our ass, so the cops won’t do it Niggas paying twice for a seat at the table Niggas not gon’ be interrupted Fuck it You don’t like it You don’t want to hear it Kick a bucket Niggas gettin’ tired of being used like a puppet Niggas cuttin’ ties with that P.O.C. You here 'cause of my black legacy While disrespecting people like me And you wouldn’t even be Here if my ancestors didn’t die to be free Niggas wanna take my shit Niggas wanna act real slick I’m talkin ya’ll niggas Niggas say they want the carrot, but they get the stick A nigga’s head harder than a brick (my nigga!) Niggas wanna run up real quick Niggas talkin’ with the toothpick Them some beautiful niggas Niggas like Versace but they homophobic Timbs for the ass they ‘bout to kick
3.
4.
Black Hurts 03:27
Is it in my skin Why they hate me so Is that why they shoot me 10 times in a row Is that why they fear me Do they even know How am I supposed to smile When they make me feel so low If I show I'm angry Why am I threat If I can't be happy Can I get upset Do I need their permission Can I express it yet Why do I have to listen When I tell them they forget Just being black Is a burden Is a burden Their something to attack You're not a person You're not a person With the whole world on your back You keep servin' You keep servin' And by the time you snap You've been hurtin' Sick of hurtin' Out of concrete Am I supposed to bloom Can I grow (grow) If I have no room (room) How can I be myself In a costume How can I build a house From a wooden broom If I don't die From sickle cell I'm sure to go (go) From raising hell (hell) The rage inside me Makes me wanna yell But if I do that I'll be killed as well Just being black Is a burden Is a burden You're something to attack You're not a person You're not a person The whole world on your back You keep servin' You keep servin' And by the time you snap You've been hurtin' Sick of hurtin' Isn't it such a pity My racial identity Will always be held against me Can it be Just being black Is a burden Is a burden Their something to attack You're not a person You're not a person The whole world on your back You keep servin' You keep servin' And by the time you snap You've been hurtin' You're sick of hurtin'
5.
MTF 03:13
She lies awake With a damaged heart Can't catch a break Can't get a restart One bad mistake Her whole world fell apart She's the one the world forsakes Imitates her art She was looking for the money to afford a change A client told her that can be arranged Woo-hoo He got her in a room in a cheap motel Didn't take his abuse, so she went to jail Woo-hoo After her arrest They put her with the men She said I may not have the chest But I don't belong with them They didn't honor her request To be put with the women They simply left her dispossessed To endure all their torment In the human food chain She knew where she ranked With a choice so insane Either kill or be shanked She was looking for the money to afford a change A client told her that can be arranged Woo-hoo He got her in a room in a cheap motel Didn't take his abuse, so she went to jail Woo-hoo
6.
7.
When I was five Learned you were alive How did you survive, Mr. Robertson You went to jail I knew how to spell Why didn't you write, Mr. Robertson? First Verse: I was your third Her only one The things I've heard That you've done So absurd Not one word From you, Mr. Robertson Hook: You don't know me And I (I) don't (don't) know you, Mr. Robertson Second Intro: Abandoned young, taken in by a coven I'd receive unconditional lovin' Never to be seen in the house of my brethren Given some time, I'd be missing nothin' Second Verse: Was damn near grown You tried to come back home Your heart made of glass My heart turned to stone Too many years had passed To the door you were shown Goodbye, Mr. Robertson Hook: You don't know me And I (I) don't (don't) know you, Mr. Robertson Bridge: I can't love A man that I barely know I let you go The one absent Is never the parent, Mr. Robertson Outro: Abandoned young, taken in by a coven I'd receive unconditional lovin' Never to be seen in the house of the brethren Given some time, I'd be missing nothing
8.
9.
Ms. Mizell 03:25
Ms. Mizell, I know you don’t feel well But there’s something, I have got to tell Promise you won’t scream and yell Or lock me, away in my shell You ask, why I seem so afraid And I say, I’m just in the 9th grade And I’m scared, you won’t accept me And at 15, I’ll lose my family Ms. Mizell, this is so hard to say But I’m sure, I’ve always been this way Ms. Mizell, am I welcome to stay? Once you know, that your only son is gay… Ms. Mizell, I see the pain inside But your tears, makes me want to run and hide You look at me, as though I’ve already died But I tell you this, to avoid suicide… You say, son give me time, I’ll adjust From the start, it’s just been the two of us In my love, you can always trust I’ll be by your side, even when I’m ash and dust Ms. Mizell, you heard what I had to say.. And I’m sure, that you love me all the way… Ms. Mizell, you seem more than okay… Now you know, your only son is gay…
10.
11.
Taken many things that came from me Blues, Jazz, Rock n' Roll and that's just 3 Appropriating black identity You want to laugh and have a "kiki" When white gays claim their inner black woman That shit ain't funny They'll wear blackface, just give them a moment Did I just spill their tea My racial cause, you want to join it But never take a knee An angry mob and we'll see them running As we're swinging from a tree You know all the shit you do So don't act all brand new No denying what we've been through Though the words I speak be true I want it back Everything you stole from me Give it all back My culture and history I'm taking it back You can kick and scream and squeeze But I want it back To see you begging on your knees You take from me and claim it as your own From the way I talk or hold a microphone You can never seem to leave my shit alone You'll take blood from a stone First it's too black for you to ever want it In condescending tone Its just black art til' you wanna own it And then you bitch and moan Next thing I know, your name is on it And you want to be my clone I started this and now you're my opponent I hate you to the bone You know all the shit you do So don't act all brand new No denying what we've been through Though the words I speak be true I want it back Everything you stole from me Give it all back My culture and history I'm taking it back You can kick and scream and squeeze But I want it back To see you begging on your knees
12.
13.
They live in my dreams To my chagrin And from what it seems They must be kin I’ve seen them all In my grandmother’s photographs She keeps in her room They show me the lives They lived on my behalf So that I could bloom They live in my dreams Much to my chagrin And from what it seems They must be kin And from what it seems They must be my kin They live in my dreams And I converse with them They live in my dreams To tell me where I’ve been They must be kin…
14.
Reparations 03:00
See me walking home, they think that I'm a savage She tried to hide her purse, cuz she think that I'm gon' grab it She looks to me like I'm gon' help her racist habit I don't need ya fake ass white guilt, you can have it See me outta place, I made it 'cross the redline Where my 40 acres at, you way past the deadline The bill's been past due for my bloodline 1619 east Virginia shoreline Tryin' not to sink Black life will end up driving you to drink At the edge, in the margin, on the brink If you ain't black, don't give a fuck what you think Every time I get to thinkin' about Tulsa Within weeks, I develop a new ulcer Blood spilled like a tangerine mimosa Deserve the wrath of a black union soldier Today (aye) None of you will ever get away (aye) Owe me 90 times for every ancestor you slayed (aye) If you dead, all of your descendants they gon' pay (aye) Better have my money by the end of the day (aye) What I say, black millennials No we don't play (aye) Get that policy written down and underway (aye) Wanna show you sorry, cut that check without delay (aye) I want the living standards of a white west village gay (aye) Don't need another liquor store--a place for hallelujah Don't need another prison--in case I smoke the hookah Plenty white supremacy--from here to Chattanooga Reconcile the past, I'm tryin' to have a better future Now we're here Ain't no going back We're here to stay (aye) West African slave traders you gon' pay (aye) For every black body that you sold and you betrayed (aye) Once I'm done here, then expect me on the way (aye) Tryin' not to sink Black life will end up driving you to drink At the edge, in the margin, on the brink If you ain't black, don't give a fuck what you think Every time I get to thinkin' about Tulsa Within weeks, I develop a new ulcer Blood spilled like a tangerine mimosa Deserve the wrath of a black union soldier
15.
16.
I'm not afraid To receive your affection And I wouldn't trade It for the rarest possession I lay on your chest And then I can go to sleep My heart can rest 'Cause my love is yours to keep I'm glad you stayed I know I'm made of imperfection Such love displayed Leaves nothing to question Well my heart is a mess Whenever I hear you speak But more or less You soothe me with your mystique Hugging you is home The scent of your comb Feels like I caught the groom's bouquet Makes me want to get married today... You're my parade You're my forward direction And in retrograde You're my best recollection 'Cause I'll acquiesce To whatever you ask of me And I'll confess I'm with you 'cause I want to be...
17.
Been waiting by the phone (you don’t call me) I’m here all alone (you don’t call me) After all the love I’ve shown (you don’t call me) Given up my throne (you don’t call me) Suffered an unholy matrimony For the sake of never being lonely Believing in the dream of one and only All that talk about love was just baloney But you’re a ghost And I got too close I need another dose Now I’m so morose Tears ain’t never stopped the raining Words ain’t ever done explaining Injuries ain’t worth sustaining After all the work and straining Don’t wanna be around (you don’t tell me) You feel letdown (and you don’t tell me) It’s the weight of the crown (you don’t tell me) You just shutdown (and you don’t tell me) Nothing about this can be healthy No voicemail, text, or a selfie I never knew that silence was so deadly I assume that we’ll talk when you’re ready But you’re a ghost And I got too close I need another dose Now I’m so morose Tears ain’t never stop the raining Words ain’t ever done explaining Injuries ain’t worth sustaining After all the work and straining
18.

about

An ethnographic-musical album by Terry Blade with a focus on the intersectionality of his social and cultural identity as a gay Black-American descendant of slaves. The project incorporates original music with ethnographic audio recordings (1941 - 1975) of former enslaved African-Americans (and their descendants) curated from the archives of the American Folklife Center, Citizen DJ Project - American Dialect English Recordings of the United States Library of Congress. The ethnographic recordings are captured throughout the album's 11 track interludes.

credits

released February 5, 2021

Written, Performed, Arranged, Compiled, Produced, and Executive Produced By: Terry Blade and Blade Modus Records

Co-Executive Produced, Published, and Supported By: Jay Carney, Starburst Records

Mixed, Mastered and Co-Produced By: Vi@ProtiliusProductions

Album Cover Artwork By: Michael Vargas

Distributed By: CD Baby

Historical Recordings Provided By: U.S. Library of Congress, American Folklife Center

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Terry Blade Chicago, Illinois

Terry Blade is a singer-songwriter. A multi-genre artist, his musical work is grounded in his experience as a black queer artist.

Since his 2020 debut, he has won more than 75 awards and nominations for his music. He has drawn comparisons to artists such as Meshell Ndegeocello, Macy Gray, and Antony and the Johnsons.

He was born and raised in Washington, DC, and resides in Chicago, IL.
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